A funny yet oh-so-real thought on Pregnancy

"Unfit" Pregnancy   - Written by Michelle O'Neal

I was thumbing through a Fit Pregnancy magazine in the doctor’s office today. I think a more apt title would be Paranoid Pregnancy (subtitle: For celebrity moms with live-in dieticians and personal trainers). The articles made my current worries seem worse and then gave me a slew of new ones to add to the list. Eat fish every week, but not too much, and not the kinds with high mercury levels or those that are not sustainably caught, of course. Exercise several times a week, but not enough to get your heart rate up (isn’t that what exercises does?). And can someone tell me how one controls what position one sleeps in? Pregnant women are supposed to sleep on their left sides for optimal blood flow and kidney function, but without a sleep-harness of some sort, good luck with that! Beware of toxins, allergens, and bedbugs in mattresses. Avoid cellphones; don’t even carry one near your abdomen. Throw away your drop-sided crib. The more I read, the more fearful and unfit I felt.

Some people take the stance that “it didn’t kill us” when they reflect on upbringings sans carseats and hand-sanitizer and with lead paint or asbestos lurking in every corner. I see where they are coming from, but the truth is: something is killing us. Life is a terminal condition. We need to make the most out of every day.  

So let yourself off the hook. Embrace plastic. Eat a hot dog. No mother wakes up and says: “I am going to be a crummy mom today. I plan to endanger my children, born and unborn.” We get by. We do our best with the energy, know-how, resources available at that particular point in time. Women conceived, carried, and delivered babies without the internet not so long ago. Without wipe-warmers and organic, unbleached Egyptian cotton crib sheets. And put down those magazines. The ink is probably toxic anyway.